seriously bending over is overrated. what can you possibly accomplish by bending over? you are thinking, "well, to pick things up silly", "to stretch out those old creaky muscles", well you are wrong; very, very, wrong. in truth bending over accomplishes nothing but making your arse stick up and spread across, scaring and scarring everyone in a one mile radius, possibly more depending on your arse size. at present i am only admitting to a one mile radius. what i admit to and what is reality are two entirely different things. you will just have to trust me. so back to my point about bending over........i can only bend over part of the way before a screaming(yes my abdomen screams), burning, tearing sensation rips through my belly button area which could indeed result in my screaming had i stayed there for too long. you are now screaming at my poor sentence structure and poor use of grammar. this new situation counts as a new development in the unstable stomach situation. in truth though, i bet this is a very old development because bending over would mean i am doing work(cleaning house etc.) and i swore off work two years ago. hmmmm maybe three years ago. not sure when it happened but i know i swore it off. perhaps my not going to a surgeon is also because i am very curious to see what happens to my unraveling abdomen. will my muscle wall completely open up spilling all of my intestines out into the skin sack? will all of my organs fall out with? i am fairly certain my bladder is being pushed down or something is touching it that should not be. i plan to post pictures of before and after so we can all stare in fascination at how grotesque my stomach was and continues to be. perhaps some of you would like to take a crack at, well, the crack in my stomach. feel free. in fact, i encourage it. we could start a pool and have a winner at the end of it all.
your unraveling pill head
